Cupra Formentor: An excellent machine, but you've probably never heard of it

"That thing is your driveway looks nice, Deccie. But what is it?" 

"It’s a Cupra."

 "A wha’?"

This was typical of the discourse among neighbours and friends who, on a weekly basis, take considerable interest on what kit it is that’s in the driveway.

In the case of the Cupra Formentor VZ2 only about 2% of those inquiring – and roughly 95% would know quite a bit about cars and are proud of their expertise – knew of which it was they were talking. This one had most of them stumped.

“A Cupra? But what is it?” 

As I explained patiently to all inquirers, Cupra is a new sub-brand established by SEAT as an upmarket contender in the performance and electric segments.

Previously, of course, all performance SEATs were Cupra models – Leon Cupra etc. – but now Cupra is a brand in its own right and the Formentor is the first model it has built.

There are no SEAT badges in evidence here, rather the ‘spider with just four legs’ logo which Cupra has adopted and which is said to symbolise “the sense of belonging to a clan,” according to Jordi Font, the head of Colour and Trim. Whatever about that, it still looks like a spider with just four legs.

Logo aside, what of the Formentor? Well the VZ2 version we tested is the top-of-the pile Formentor here right now and it has to be said it does not look too different styling-wise from SEAT’s trio of SUVs – inside and out – but different enough to get people asking what the hell it actually is.

Currently there are three Formentors – one with a 1.5 TSI petrol engine, one with plug-in hybrid technology and this one, the VZ2. In time there will also be a VZ3 and a VZ5, which will be even more performance orientated, but may not be seen here.

Not that this one isn’t sparky. Basically it takes most of the good bits – engine, 4x4 system and so forth – from the wonderful Golf R, a car we’ve lauded in these columns on many occasions. That means it has a two-litre turbocharged four pot under the hood producing a knee-trembling 310 bhp.

It also has a dual clutch seven-speed auto ‘box and full-time four-wheel drive and the combination of all these elements adds up to a limited top speed of 250 km/h and a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it 0-100 km/h time of 4.9 seconds.

Now, while this is definitely a thrilling ride and a car you will learn to trust even in the most taxing circumstances, I must confess it was not the tight-as-a-snare-drum drive that the Golf R provides. The steering felt a little numb and performance was not as whipsaw smart as its’ VW cousin.

Having said that, this thing is bloody quick and you can pick your drive setting from the Comfort, Normal and Sport settings. Oddly enough, given the nature of this beast, the Comfort and Normal settings provide the best options.

In Sport mode, the adjustable damper settings go into what might be called ‘basalt mode’ – meaning that they are severely unforgiving. You would think that the Sport option is the best one for press-on motoring, but it simply makes the suspensions too hard for Irish conditions and will result in a bonanza for your orthodontist.

If you go through the car settings – which is actually quite laborious thanks to a knacky touchscreen system which is not the easiest to navigate – you will find alternatives to what would appear to be on offer and some of these choices are the ones to select because they offer you options that are actually more comfortable to contend with than the standard trio.

You might find that the Formentor thus leans a bit more into and out of corners, but it appeared to me that you got better grip levels and much less potential dental damage.

Having finally arrived at this set up, the Formentor will hit your chosen apex with absolute accuracy and as the car is seemingly without vice when it comes to understeer, you can count on it to hold the line you’ve chosen without any drama or fuss.

While Sport mode extends a rev range a little and provokes all sorts of delicious exhaust rumblings, the effect on the damping is tiresome as well as dentally perilous. In any other setting, the Formentor still accelerates like a bullet from a .45 (the brakes are equally demonic and purposeful), but the ride quality is so much more acceptable.

For all that though it doesn’t seem to have the same edge as the Golf R and appears to be a little less ferocious. On top of that, it is not as practical as the VW either.

While the Wolfsburg machine offers regular hatchback practicality and day-to-day ease of use, the Formentor, although an SUV, seems tighter in the rear seats and the small boot capacity will put off farmers’ market stall holders.

The design is supposed to be sports utility (or sports activity, if you so desire), but it is actually more like an estate on stilts really.

That said, it is a very eye-catching and the ‘Camouflage Green’ overcoat adorned by the tester was a truly pleasing to look at and especially so when all the Cupra characteristic copper coloured trim (badging, brake calipers etc.) is added to the equation.

The copper trim elements continue throughout the interior with appropriately coloured stitching utilised across the dashboard, the leather steering wheel and the door cards; it adds personality and style to an already attractive design, although much of the décor is taken straight from the SEAT playbook.

Simply for its on-road abilities, the Formentor probably deserves a five-star review, but because of that niggly infotainment system and the tightness of rear space and boot capacity, it gets shaved a star.

But the bottom line here is that, along with a lot of other people, I am a little mystified by the whole Cupra-as-a-brand idea. I’m not sure who they are aiming this car at, especially as most enthusiasts will have already got it that the name signalled sporting intent. As it is, most people haven’t a clue what the separate branding is supposed to tell them – about the car or themselves.

It is a very, very decent driving proposition and attractive enough to turn heads wherever it goes. For many people, however, and especially those for whom premium motoring has to come with either a German or British (but German-owed) badge, a bespoke SEAT will not light a burning fire of desire within.

And that’s a pity really, because this really is a good stab at a premium product from the (German-owned) Spanish outfit. Perhaps with time and perseverance they will persuade people of the worth of their endeavours, but right now that seems an uphill task.

For now buyers will have to live with the fact that when they tell inquiring people it’s a Cupra decorating their driveway, the response will always be the same.

“A wha’?”