Headache I File: Get I Sex A Orgasm When

Sex File: I get a headache when I orgasm — Pic: Istock

Mon, 24 Jun, 2024 - 02:00

Suzi Godson

Sometimes I get a really terrible headache after I've had an orgasm. I'm in my late 50s, but seem to have got through menopause without many issues, so I don't think it's that. It's making me reluctant to have sex, or feel stressed about it if we do, so I wonder if it has become a vicious circle. Should I worry?

Headaches after sexual activity, including after an orgasm, are known as sex headaches or coital cephalalgia. In most cases the pain increases in intensity as sexual excitement builds or, as you describe, comes on very suddenly and intensely just before or after orgasm. In about a third of cases, the pain is only on one side or in a specific or localised area. It is typically severe for between a few minutes and 24 hours, and can then sustain at a milder intensity for up to 72 hours.

Sex headaches are not common, but are well documented and well researched. Men are nearly twice as likely to have them as women and they can occur at any age. While they are usually nothing to worry about, it's wise to investigate any headache that comes on after sexual activity to exclude the possibility of vascular issues. It is important you don't just tell your GP that you are getting headaches. You need to make it explicit that they occur during, or as a result of, sexual activity.

Before your appointment it would be helpful to keep a headache diary. Tracking when the headaches occur, their intensity, duration and any other symptoms will help your doctor to see what is going on and make diagnosis easier. Your GP might refer you for a scan. Although that might feel a bit scary, getting checked out will put your mind at ease, helping to break the cycle and alleviate the tension you feel when you anticipate having sex.

Your GP or specialist might suggest taking medication to prevent the headaches from occurring. Beta blockers and nonsteroidal anti-inflammatories can help to prevent sex headaches, but pharmacological solutions can be a bit counterproductive because many of the drugs used to prevent sex headaches have side effects that affect sexual desire.

Research into sex headaches suggests that the type of sexual activity doesn't seem to make a difference. However, neck and shoulder tension can contribute to headaches, so it is worth experimenting with positions that don't exert physical pressure on your head and neck. You could also try to alleviate tension before sex by having a hot bath and getting your partner to massage your neck and shoulders.

You don't say whether you are prone to headaches, but people who get migraines are more likely to get sex headaches. They are also more likely to have difficulty sleeping, which can have a detrimental impact on wellbeing. There is no specific research on the impact of relaxation techniques such as deep breathing, meditation or progressive muscle relaxation on sex headaches, but they can reduce overall stress and tension, which would obviously be beneficial.

Hydration is also hugely important. We should all try to drink small amounts of water throughout the day, every day. I would also advocate yoga as a way of decompressing the spine and alleviating tension in the back, neck and shoulders. It makes you much more flexible too, which has lots of other surprising sexual benefits.